98551
Joke of the Day
"I have a good joke about a nice balloon. Oh wait. It just got away from me."
Next Joke
"Next time a dude says ""Pictures or it didn't happen"", punch them in the throat, take a pic, and tell a story about a guy you throat punched."
"What do lesbian couples do once a month? Finger paint."
"I like how when you pull down on a paper towel dispenser you either get half a paper towel or half the roll."
"""youre acting like a big baby"" wow great observation dipshit i am basically a baby that has aged a lot and gained weight. we all are"
"John Cena wakes up in a hospital Cena:""Where am I?"" Nurse:""ICU"" Cena:""No you don't """
"I'm still not sure how the church expects me to do all that kneeling and standing and praying on just that one little wafer they feed you."
"What's red and green and spins round & round & round? A frog in a blender."
"How many hipsters does it take to screw in a light bulb? It's some obscure number.. You've probably never heard of it"
"*burst into doctor's office* ME: I'm no longer canstopetid DOCTOR: You mean constipated ME: No I've had a vowel movement DOCTOR: Get out"