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Joke of the Day

"I want to throw a party with fake alcohol and see how many people act wasted."

"Girls call me ugly until they find out how much money I make. Then they call me ugly and poor."

"What's Nigel Farage's favourite Christmas song? I'm dreaming of a white Christmas."

"I avoid making friends by being honest with people"

"I joined /r/NoFap Never thought it would be this hard..."

"Why do watermelons have water in Them? Because they are planted in the spring!"

"""Don't you play stupid with me!"" shouted my wife. ""Why would I play something I have no chance of winning?"" I replied."

"What is the difference between a priest and a zit? A zit wait to come on your face till your 13"

"What did Sherlock ask his friend when he wanted to know what they were having for dinner? Watson the menu"

"What's your best ""A guy walks into a bar"" joke"