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Joke of the Day

"My thesis on Orbital Flatulence took seven years of hard work... Well, that's what I tell everyone. I was really just farting around."

"Whenever I get the urge to run around naked, I stop and drink a bit of Windex It prevents streaking."

"What's the difference between a dead baby and a dead gorilla? There aren't any dead babies at the Cincinnati Zoo."

"There's three types of people in this world. Those who can count and those who can't. Which one are you??"

"I'm so pro-life, I believe life begins at erection."

"Me: I don't like online shopping. I'm old school. I need to touch it, smell it, taste it. Her: I still need you to leave our lingerie store."

"My friend asked me if I was ready to go to the nudist colony I was born ready."

"Where do space monsters live? In far distant terror-tory."

"What's a hats favourite thing? Getting head"

"I judge the strength of the economy based on what type of candy people hand out on Halloween."