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Joke of the Day

"What did the American call Karl Marx when a shrine was dedicated to him in Japan? A Kami."

"Why is unemployment rising in Jamaica? Because they're jahbless!"

"It is better to be on seventh heaven, rather than on the seventh month."

"Gravity is such a slut She goes down on everything"

"I was cleaning one of my finger guns and accidentally blew a hole through my air guitar."

"My girlfriend hates when I make jokes about her weight... She needs to lighten up."

"There's no easy way to steal a watermelon."

"And Jesus said unto his 12 apostles as he was being nailed to the cross. Don't touch my fucking Easter eggs, i'll be back on Monday."

"[Watching babies first steps] *turns to wife* Has he been drinking?"

"I wish I were a Jedi. I don't want to use the Force or anything. I just want to hang out in my bathrobe all day."