97757

Joke of the Day

"What is the difference between acne and a Catholic priest? Acne waits till you're 13 to come on your face."

"Wife at dinner party: ""my husband is always calling me Sarah Palin"" Guests: ""that's funny, why does he call you Sarah Palin?"" Wife: ""because he hates Sarah Palin."""

"Why couldn't the Tuba player get a date? He was too low key."

"My friends really into acid rock... Personally I prefer my music with more bass."

"Why'd the scarecrow get promoted? He was outstanding in his field."

"What did the yoga teacher say when someone asked if she wanted to leave the party early? Namaste"

"Im sorry, but you only have two weeks to live *slides the doctor a five dollar bill* Ooooh make that 3 weeks buddy *winks at loved ones*"

"Tequila is just the grown up version of choose your own adventure books."

"If caitlyn Jenner goes missing Do they put her photo on the back of a bottle of tranny fluid"

"What do you call someone who cuts down trees? A lumberjack, you fucking idiot."