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Joke of the Day

"Tequila is just the grown up version of choose your own adventure books."

"What is owned by you but mostly... What is owned by you but mostly used by others? Your name! -"

"office joke It's amazing how a person can compliment and insult you at the same time. Recently, when I greeted my coworker, she said, ""You look so gorgeous, I didn't recognize you."""

"What mythical creature is the most bloody? A hemogoblin!"

"I only have Facebook to keep track of where everyone I know is going to be, so I don't show up there."

"Someone threw a bottle of Omega 3 pills at me... I suffered super fish oil injuries."

"Tomorrow you should turn back our clocks one hour. for Daylight Saving Time Unless you're Arabic, in which case you should set it forward 14 centuries."

"Why was the ground all white after Custer's last stand? Because the Indians just kept coming, and coming..."

"India launched a rocket to Mars this morning. That's a heck of a place to put a call centre."

"My girl asks why I love chocolate so much. Well, I have several Reisens..."