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Joke of the Day

"Let's play a game: If you were stranded forever on a desert island and had only one book of Russian literature, how would you kill yourself?"

"If you're gonna take the high road,wear a skirt. I need something to look at from the low road."

"What do you call a kid who falls into a gorilla enclosure? Zoolander"

"I just named my whiskey ""Titanic"" because it goes down better with ice."

"Startup idea Dating app for pedophiles, Kinder. [huh?](/s ""Yiddish for 'children'. Also, 'pssss, wanna buy a startup?'"")"

"What's the difference between a Zippo and a hippo? One's a little lighter."

"What do you call a Cuban Atheist? Infidel Castro."

"Why do porn sites have a Google+ option? I don't want my friends knowing I use Google+"

"What's the difference between a Priest and a Wristwatch? A priest's hands stop at 10."

"I saw this guy in Walmart... ...who was bashing his head on the border between aisles 9 and 10. He said ""Go away muggle, I'm trying to get into aisle 9 3/4!"""