97357

Joke of the Day

"Seriously, it's almost 2014, can we please get some waterproof phones? I would like to text in the shower."

"How many South Americans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A Brazillian."

"Q: What did Sushi A say to Sushi B? A: Wasabi?"

"Look. If we're going with redundancies like ""tunafish"", I'll just have my beefmeat and be done with it."

"Yes he's financially stable & hasn't been to jail for domestic violence like the other guy but I can change the other guy wait & see - Women"

"How to emberass an acrchaeologist? How do you embarrass an archaeologist? Give him a used tampon and ask him which period it came from."

"It's like these people at the liquor store have never seen somebody pay with this much change"

"Walentine's Day When your woman decides to give the gift you really wanted."

"Stop calling it ""sweater weather"" and call it what it really is, ""I don't have to shave my legs for 6 months weather."""

"Harambe jokes... Can we kill them too?"