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Joke of the Day
"The shortest way to piss off a hipster... Apple phone & iwatch"
Next Joke
"With a name like Progressive, shouldn't the commercials be better by now?"
"TIL the French flag is traditionally made with Velcro So they could remove the red and blue bits in times of war"
"I always bring a condom with me on a night out. Unfortunately, it's always the same one."
"Actually, conservation of angular momentum makes the world go 'round."
"What do you call a pretentious mime? A dick in a box."
"Why do women wear panties with flowers on them? In loving memory of all the faces that were buried in there."
"An electrician comes home at 2 am.... His wife asks, ""wire you insulate?"" He replies, ""watt's the problem, I'm ohm aren't I?"""
"I went to a casting for the lead role in a midget porn film. I didn't get the part, but I was told I made the short list."
"Why was the chess player pregnant? Because they were mated."