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Joke of the Day

"A magic eraser, but for my bar tab."

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"It all changed when my girlfriend got pregnant.... My name, my address, my phone number..."
"Spent way too much time walking around the house trying to track down an odd noise that turned out to be a whistle in my nose."
"Why can't you see elephants hiding in trees? They're really good at it"
"Screw it, I'm starting Friday now."
"What type of job does T-Rex have? He is small arms dealer"
"Nicholas Cage was only good in FaceOff because he was played by John Travolta."
"Why doesn't Oedipus swear? Because he kisses his mum with that mouth."
"What has a bottom on a top? A leg."
"What's the difference between Batman and a black man? Batman can go to a store without robbin'."