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Joke of the Day
"With a name like Progressive, shouldn't the commercials be better by now?"
Next Joke
"Why did Kim Jong Un's father go to hospital? He was Kim Jong Il"
"Hey, I have an idea. Instead of complaining about your auto-correct every day, how about going into your settings & turning it the fcuk off?"
"A guy asked my girlfriend ""Who would win a fight between a taco and a hotdog?"" ... so I punched him in the head."
"How do you find Will Smith in a snowstorm? You look for fresh prints"
"Statically, 1 in every 10 people live next to a pedophile. Not me though, I live next to a little boy with a fat ass"
"Opening a Christian gym called 'Jehovah's Fitness"
"Who are the world's fastest readers? The 911 victims. They went through 50 stories in a minute. I'm so sorry"
"Just saw a redhead break his arm. #GingerSnap"
"Why did the mobster buy a planner? So he could organize his crime"