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Joke of the Day

"I had a dark bump on my arm checked out at my ontologist... I tried to get a diagnosis but instead he went on about reality and existence."

"Last night was the third time a girl walked out midway a date. Something's still wrong in my PowerPoint presentation."

"Doctors say eating a piece of Bacon takes 9 mins off your life...if my math is correct i died in 1781"

"In a blind test, 100% of participants... said they totally didn't see this joke coming."

"Why is it called a wonderbra? Because when its opened you wonder where are the boobs"

"""Java is to Javascript as ham is to hamster."""

"In my experience, most arguments are caused by a misunderstanding of the fact that I'm right."

"Why did the leper fail his driving test? He left his foot on the clutch."

"I had a few too many beers at an art exhibition and threw up all over the floor. Someone offered me three grand for it."

"Dad: i don't know why you wear a bra-you've got nothing to put in it. MUM: you wear pants don't you?"