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Joke of the Day

"The Chuck Norris military unit was not used in the game Civilization 4, because a single Chuck Norris could defeat the entire combined nations of the world in one turn."

"A man walks into a library and asks the Mexican librarian which section would have information about Guppies. The librarian answers... ""Microfiche""."

"The conditions inside my car have drawn attention from my boyfriend, my mother, and the Center for Disease Control."

"Last week I walked up to Wayne Rooney at the airport and said,""How about an autograph mate?"" ""Sure."" He replied. So I signed a photo print of myself and gave it to him."

"NBC is contemplating a new TV series titled ""Airline Tragedies."" They are putting the pilot together right now."

"I was told I look like a nazi soldier... And I said, ""no, this is a Wehrmacht uniform""."

"Where the most likely place to find a crack whore? Between a rock and a hard place."

"A dyslexic man... Walks into a bra"

"You say tomato I say gross"

"My therapist said I need to find a new hobby. Besides pissing off therapists."