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Joke of the Day

"Why do Yoda's jokes always suck? Says the punch line first, he does."

"An & was driving down the street Until it rear-anded me."

"As an ornothologist and a pimp I structure payment based on the old saying: A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush."

"I'd like to say that ALL quilts are great... ...but I try to avoid making blanket statements."

"what's black and white and red all over a nun with a harpoon through her"

"Someone just used my driveway to turn around and now I'm standing outside with two open beers and *lonely face*"

"I went to the psychiatrist today I told him that I have started hearing voices. He told me that I don't have a psychiatrist."

"Did you hear about the teacher who was always cross eyed? She struggled to control her pupils."

"I peed on the floor in front of the beverages at a party Now there's no punchline."

"I asked my wife if she enjoys a cigarette after sex and she said, ""No, one drag is enough."""