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Joke of the Day

"Reading an article about how more kids are ""experimenting with drugs""... What does that mean? More kids tripping in lab coats?"

"Q: Why is Bill Clinton diverting federal funds from improving schools to improving jails? A: Because when his term is through he won't be going to school."

"I really thought Monica Lewinsky should be on a dollar.. but she's already had her face on a Bill."

"Why are Mumford & Sons the only agnostic rock band? Because they don't even know if they believe."

"What if I never *dramatic pause* sleep *dramatic pause* a- *falls asleep during third dramatic pause*"

"I like my women like I like my coffee Black, bitter, and preferably fair trade"

"How do you kill a one-legged fox? Make him run across Canada."

"ME: Take care of my cat while I'm away? HITMAN: [screwing on silencer] No problem."

"Last night last night a girl kept pounding on my hotel room door.....finally i had to let her out..."

"What's the difference between a seal and a sealion? An extra electron"