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Joke of the Day

"What did the lesbian vampire say to the other lesbian vampire? Same time next month?"

"I think mascots are the hardest roles for actors to play. They really have to get into their characters."

"Anyone else able to tie rope using telekinesis? Thought knot."

"My wedding vows said ""till death do us part."" My wife died, so I was a free man. Then she came back and bit me."

"What gets easier to pick up the heavier it gets? A woman."

"why are dubstep artists so bad at fishing? They always drop the bass"

"People Says ,""SMOKING KILLS SLOWLY......"" . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . So What, Who'z in a Hurry ....!!!! ;-)"

"If I were Russian I'd be Vladimir Poopin"

"Do you enjoy interacting with people?"" ""Nope"" ""Great, you're hired!"" DMV interview process"

"""If you woke up with Vaseline up your butt would you tell anybody?"" ""Um No"" ""Wanna go camping?"""