94755

Joke of the Day

"Two brothers wrote an exam. One got in, the other didn't. The one who didn't get in got in the second time. His TWIN chance was what got him in."

"My girlfriend invited me to have some cyber-sex... I thought it was gonna be just some us time but it turned out it was a 4G!"

"I told all my colleagues at work that I have a twin so that when I see them in public I don't have to talk to them."

"Why did the Chemistry Teacher go to Jail? He got caught giving alcohol to minors."

"I hope the next Adam Sandler movie has a wacky grandpa who uses ""bae"" all the time so you guys will stop thinking its funny"

"""Because Fuck you, that's why!"" is a perfectly legitimate response to any question."

"The Seahawks beat the Panthers up so bad that people in North Carolina are wearing JE SUIS CAM t-shirts."

"""Johnny Depp looks good in that outfit!"" ""That's Diane Keaton."""

"A man walks up to his friend and asks him what he is doing... The man replies: I'm donating this chair to CHAIRity."

"I hope at my funeral someone has the foresight to bring a Ouija board so I can live tweet Hell."