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Joke of the Day

"It's amazing the things you'll do for a person when you want to see them naked."

"20 Years Ago... 20 years ago we had Steve Jobs, Johnny Cash, and Bob Hope. And now, we have no jobs, no cash, and no hope"

"I think I'm gonna make a bracelet that supports getting rid of bracelets that support stuff."

"VICTIM: He had a beard & a scar SKETCH ARTIST: Is this him? VICTIM: That's Bart Simpson SKETCH ARTIST: Yeah I can only draw a couple things"

"Book Of Tim, 3:13. Behold, the lord said unto them, leave not your nachos unattended for quickly they become the spoils of thieving women."

"What's the difference between jelly and jam? You can't jelly your dick into a girls ass."

"What do you call an incredibly well-dressed punk? The Speaker of the House"

"What did the bartender say to the gold when the gold walked into a bar? ""AU, get outta here!"""

"Where did Napoleon keep his armies? Up his sleevies."

"How did the trout become a symbol for Christianity? Easy. By dropping ""trou"""