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Joke of the Day

"Remember don't judge, you never know what another person is going through Unless they're constantly oversharing on Facebook, then go ahead"

"What walks on eight legs until the age of one, four legs until the age of twenty, and two legs after? The Weasley twins"

"Prof asked if anyone liked comic books. I raised my hand. She didnt add anything or say why it mattered. Just wanted to isolate me socially."

"What do sprinters eat before a race? Nothing... they fast."

"Why did the girl bring 2 basketballs to the basketball game? Because there was 2 basketball courts. DUH!"

"*surgeon opens cooler during transplant* *cooler is full of Gatorade* ""Wait but this means..."" *cut to surgeon's kids dumping kidney on coach*"

"Chicken what do you call a chicken staring at a lettuce... Chicken sees a salad"

"Have you ever tried to eat a clock? It's very time consuming. ^^^^^Sorry"

"How do you make an apple puff? Chase it round the garden"

"A survey recently revealed that 50% of people shit in the shower, do you know what the other 50% do? I didn't think so you filthy twat!"