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Joke of the Day

"guy at seaworld: ""it's a cross between an eel and a shark, we're asking everyone to pick a name for him"" wife: ""steve"" me: ""sharkeel o'neal"""

"Where do Siths do their shopping? At the Darth Mall"

"A Roman soldier walks into a bar He holds up two fingers and says ""I'll have five beers please"""

"Did you hear about the chef that died? He pasta way. We cannoli do so much. His legacy will become a pizza history."

"I just spent fifteen minutes wondering how mermaids poop in case anyone out there is looking for a best friend or arch nemesis or something."

"What does a woman and Kentucky Fried Chicken have in common? When you're done with the breast and thighs, the only thing left is a greasy box to put your bone in"

"What did the dead magician say? Abra-cadaver"

"I have the best prison name Mitochondria"

"What happens when Batman sees Catwoman? The Dark Knight rises."

"And God said unto John: ""Come forth, and you shall be granted immortality."" But John came fifth, and won a toaster."