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Joke of the Day

"Boycott shampoo. Demand real poo."

"What do you call a politician with their head up their ass? David Cameron."

"What's blue and look like pink fluff? Pink Fluff holdings its breath. What's Red and looks like Blue Fluff? Red Fluff."

"Your honor? My client would like to address the court and ruin everything."

"NSFW? - Definition of a Period A period is a bloody waste of fucking time! (works in Australia, and probably England)"

"What's the difference between a laundry machine and a girl? The washing machine doesn't get upset if I dump a load in it and never call back"

"Q: Why don't elephants go skinny dipping? A: They can't get their trunks off."

"What do you get when you cross a baseball with a turkey? A fowl ball!"

"the easiest way to distinguish between their/there/they're is to remember that they are all different words"

"One of my personalities goes to the grocery store and buys healthy food... Now, I can't find anything to eat in the fridge."