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Joke of the Day

"[Catholic church] *priest hands out ""What To Expect At Your Exorcism"" Husband: Babe, this isn't counseling Me: You said you'd try anything"

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"And God said unto John: ""Come forth, and you shall be granted immortality."" But John came fifth, and won a toaster."
"You've wasted your time explaining sex to me I still don't get it."
"*dad walks in on me doing homework* ""HAH NERD MORE LIKE HOMOWORK"" Dad you're still in third grade ""Probably because I'm not a nerd like you"""
"To err is human, to eh is Canadian."
"My Ex? Yea I'd still hit that.........WITH A CAR"
"A gun and a bullet get into a heated argument Police still don't know who fired the first shot"
"So Jeffrey Dahmer goes to the doctor... After some tests, the doctor tells Jeffery that he's tested positive for Hepatitis. Jeffrey responds ""It must of been something I ate."""
"Who is Joseph Kony's favorite rapper? Soulja Boy"
"What do you call a brony in a wheelchair? Virgin Mobile"
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