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Joke of the Day

"*dad walks in on me doing homework* ""HAH NERD MORE LIKE HOMOWORK"" Dad you're still in third grade ""Probably because I'm not a nerd like you"""

"Once upon a time (today) I had to help with pre school homework Me: -holds up yellow Me: What color is this? 4: McDonalds The end"

"Hi I was calling about the $300/hour part time job I read about in a sexy ad I saw on an illegal torrent site. Are you guys still hiring?"

"You are right, 27 is ""just a number"" but I'm looking for a man, not a boy. No offense. PS: Save my number... just in case I change my mind."

"Women jokes The fact is that I don't like jokes about women, period."

"My Taiwanese friend is very intense and driven: He has a real Taipei personality"

"I got mugged yesterday... The mugger said, ""Give me your money or you're science."" I said, ""Don't you mean history?"" He said, ""Don't try and change the subject."""

"The 8 fell over and stayed there for infinity."

"They should make a Minecraft movie It would be a blockbuster."

"the closest I've ever come to a threesome was when I was mowing the lawn and I got hit in the face by two dragonflies having sex in mid air"