93466

Joke of the Day

"Plenty of great people were single just like you are. For instance: Voldemort. Wait, bad example. You're way less talented than Voldemort."

"Baby joke http://suryakanthi.info/baby-jokes/"

"My house was haunted, so I got it exorcised by an expert. Unfortunately, I couldn't afford the payment and it got repossessed."

"Who named their company after your dick? Bill Gates."

"My uncle performed circumcisions... He kept all the foreskin and had a tailor make it into a wallet. Rub it for 5 minutes and you get a briefcase."

"If I had an ice cream truck, it would turn into a regular truck in about a half hour."

"How do you get whole race to hate you? Blow up the finish line. (I figured 2 years was long enough)"

"What's the difference between Lance Armstrong and Adolf Hitler? Hitler can't finish a race"

"I used to drink beer in my underwear but now I use a glass."

"Pretty sure that ""Willy Wonka & the Chocolate Factory"" is the kid's version of ""Saw""."