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Joke of the Day
"I contacted Screwfix the other day. Once again they have assured me they're not a dating agency."
Next Joke
"Dark humor is a lot like cancer Grown ups mainly get it but sometimes kids get it too."
"Why doesn't god like bacon? Because he isn't real."
"Give a man a fish: you just killed a fish. Teach a man to fish: you just killed like a thousand fish"
"What causes something to go up and then down? Viagra falls"
"what do Chinese people say when it is sunny outside. what do Chinese people say when it is sunny outside i wish it was raining cats and dogs that would be dericious"
"I want a real relationship; not a Facebook one"
"Called to my managers office today He said ""you can't wear pyjamas to work you idiot!"" I replied "" everyone else does though"" He replied ""THEIR PATIENTS"""
"If I ever get arrested, my one phone call will be to the police station to do a bomb scare. I'm not spending the night there."
"I saw a guy at the beach yelling ' Help! Shark! Help!' I just laughed at him... I knew that shark wasn't going to help him."