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Joke of the Day

"TIL that you can get dishonorably discharged from the Navy for boarding the wrong vessel just once Whoops, wrong sub"

"What do Hillbillies do for Halloween? They pump kin"

"1st Roman Soldier: What is the time ? 2nd Roman Soldier: XX past VII !"

"What's Avagodro's favorite type of dip? GuacaMOLE"

"To the guy in the wheelchair who stole my camouflage jacket, You can hide, but you can't run."

"What's blue and fucks grannies? Me in my lucky blue suit."

"Me: My head hasn't been in the right place lately. GF: You might want to check up your ass."

"If at first you don't succeed.. .. skydiving probably isn't for you anyway."

"He'd come off way less pretentious if he went by Daniel ""Dave"" Lewis."

"Amelia Earfart was the first woman to transatlantic fart around the world. it was silent but deadly. i love you."