138865

Joke of the Day

"Chuck Norris doesnt wear a watch, HE decides what time it is."

"Why did everyone make fun of the economist's fetish? He was into inflation."

"ME: let me be frank DAD: [eyes widen] ME: and if you say hi Frank I'm dad, I'm gonna be real pissed DAD: fair enough GonnaBeRealPissed"

"I bet Michael J. Fox makes one hell of a martini."

"Did you know that gullible is the only English word that is not in the dictionary? I'm serious, it isn't. Go look it up and see for yourself."

"Why was Simba's dad killed by the pride? Because he didn't mufasa."

"I've always got women knocking on my door... Sometimes I let them out."

"[Shop class] Satan: Whatcha makin'? God: Trust. Man can use it to form lasting bonds and friendships. What you making? Satan: A bong."

"I just told my brother he was adopted, his response was, ""At least they picked me"""

"There's a support group for people addicted to plastic surgery... One day the group leader comes in and says ""I see a lot of new faces this week... I must say, I'm disappointed!"""