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Joke of the Day

"Subway Did you use to work at subway, because you just gave me a foot-long."

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"People belittle the internet ""talking about a dress"" as if we're busy solving problems otherwise."
"BUZZ ALDRIN:They say in space no one can hear you scream, but it's not true and the other astronauts get mad at you for the rest of the trip"
"Why did the janitor take early retirement? Because he realized that grime doesn't pay."
"I have a good joke about a nice balloon. Oh wait. It just got away from me."
"Patient: Doctor you have to help me stop talking to myself. Doctor: Why is that? Patient: I'm a salesman and I keep selling myself things I don't want."
"Why does Karl Marx only drink herbal tea? Because proper tea is theft!"
"Why did the baker... Why did the baker have dirty hands? Because he kneaded a poo.... HAHAHAHA"
"What do you call a group of Spaniards in quicksand? Bean dip"
"I've just invented a perfume made from holy water Eau my God"