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Joke of the Day

"All these jokes about small hands are getting lazy. And you know what they say about lazy jokes. Bad punch lines."

"What did the saggy boob also say to the other? ""Hey, let's hang out together?"""

"So I asked my friend what ADHD was... He told me ""It's was like a better quality version of."""

"Massaging the shoulders of the person in front of you at the Redbox machine will usually help them make up their mind faster."

"I touch myself when I think of you. It's a facepalm, but I am thinking of you."

"If Usain Bolt ever becomes a zombie we are all screwed."

"What do you call always having a date for New Year's Eve? Social Security."

"Did you hear about Prince? Well I mean the artist formerly known as Prince."

"I saw a sign that said ""watch for children"". and I thought, ""That sounds like a fair trade"""

"Sometimes people suck the life out of me like there's a prize at the bottom."