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Joke of the Day

"Sometimes I'll take such a good picture of someone I'm like ""this is definitely making it into the slide show at their funeral."""

"I just opened an email from the vet wishing my dog a happy birthday. I replied asking them to call her because she can't read."

"A police officer mistakenly arrested a judge who was dressed as a convict for a costume party. He quickly learned that you should never book a judge by their cover."

"Why do French tanks have rearview mirrors? To see the battle."

"Manager Cracks a Joke. Everyone in the team laughs except one guy. Manager asks "" Didn't you understand the joke "". The guy replies "" I resigned yesterday """

"Some say a world without sin is ideal, but I disagree. After all, there's only so many problems which can be answered with cos and tan."

"Luke Skywalker uses the Force. The Force uses Chuck Norris."

"Interviewer: ""What's your greatest accomplishment?"" Me: ""I was in a lot of people's MySpace Top 8s back in 2004."""

"What do you call a French man wearing sandals? Fillipe F'Lop"

"Why did the pervert cross the road? His dick was stuck in the chicken."