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Joke of the Day

"What did the manager of a log cutting company tell his employees when they were working too slow? Chop chop."

"Why did Sepp Blatter resign from the FIFA president position? He just couldn't hold it any longer."

"How do you make an egg roll? You push it"

"What made the New Mexican sad? He was out of meth."

"What's a 6.9 A good time ruined by the period?"

"Did you hear about the guy that was accused of using his boss's hand soap as lube for masturbating? He came clean."

"What do you call a woman who knows where her husband is every night? -A widow."

"2 fish in a tank, one fish looks at the other and say's ""do you know how to drive this thing?"""

"I bought a book about addiction I've read it 50 times and it still hasn't helped."

"What happens when you combine alcohol and literature? Tequila Mockingbird"