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Joke of the Day

"I knew she was the one the moment she said those three words that took my breath away... ""THAT'S GONNA SMELL!"""

"Opening a Christian gym called 'Jehovah's Fitness'"

"I'm going to start a blog for irrational numbers... I think I'll call it the 3.1 forums..."

"ME [Puts up ""Have u seen my dog?"" posters across town] HER: Oh no! You've lost your dog! M: No I just think u should see him. He's awesome"

"My love life is like magic... Because it dosen't exist"

"What's going on in Paris is outrageous. You think the french would have surrendered by now."

"I guess the Tupperware lids in my house just graduate and go off to college or something."

"Somebody accused me of being condescending today... ...by the way, condescending is shown or characterized by a patronizing or superior attitude toward others."

"what am I? I'm owned by every man, though my length differs. Their wives use me after getting married Last Name"

"Two Sausages are Frying in a Pan... ...And one of them says to the other, 'Fuck me, it's hot in here!', to which the other replies 'FUCK ME, *A TALKIN' SAUSAGE!!!*'"