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Joke of the Day

"what am I? I'm owned by every man, though my length differs. Their wives use me after getting married Last Name"

"The guy who discovered boomerangs must have been terrified"

"Have you ever seen the movie called ""Constipated""? Well it never came out."

"Why do Scotsmen screw their sheep by the side of a cliff? Because they push back harder."

"This doughnut scented car air freshener will more than pay for itself next time I get pulled over."

"I got an adjustable stand/sit desk at work... So I don't have to take the customers' shit sitting down! And when I can't stand it anymore, I can still get my work done while sitting."

"Since joining Twitter, about 8 aggressive lampposts have walked up to me in the street and punched me in the face."

"I can not fathom how some people are exactly 6 feet tall."

"I have earned 800.25 as a male prostitute Too bad each of them paid 0.25"

"I'm starting a nightclub to cater to people infected with AIDS It's called ""Hi Five"" in Roman Numerals (HIV)"