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Joke of the Day

"People who wait 4 hours to reply to my text with ""lol"" should be shot."

"Evidently, trying to schedule parent/teacher conference over drinks and ""we'll see what happens"" is considered inappropriate."

"Did you hear, John Wayne Bobbit got his penis cut off again? Isn't that redickless?"

"Father's Day Fun: 1) Walk up to a complete stranger at lunch with his family. 2) Hug him. 3) Tell him 'Happy Father's Day dad'! 4) Run."

"Why is George Bush in bed every night by 9:10? Because nothing good happens after 9:11."

"Hey it's Bill Gates! Mr. Gates, why was 6 afraid of 7? ""I don't know, because 7 8 10?"""

"Husband-Y r there torn condoms lying on sofa? Wife-What? Where? Wife goes 2 find them & comes back angrily saying-Will you stop calling our children ""Torn condoms""?"

"How did he get from Afghanistan to Iraq? Iran (He ran). Thought of this when looking at the world map, sorry that it's terrible."

"What kind of ears do trains have? Engineers (engine ears)."

"Why are hot dogs the best dogs? Because they feed the hand that bites them."