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Joke of the Day

"I should have gone to see the optometrist I can't anymore"

"I feel like before a bee stings a human, all his dumb bee friends are like ""you can totally take him."""

"What is the best part of Pokemon Go? I can ride my bike indoors and professor oak can't do anything to stop me."

"What's a shopaholic's favourite boy band? NSYNC"

"I bet Eve bit that apple because she knew she was going to get a bunch of clothes out of it."

"""I'd like to make a large cash deposit"" teller: ok, how much do you have? ""Wow can't a guy just share his dreams without being pressured?"""

"[press session regarding increase in shark bites] Reporter: Are there more attacks in one area? Scientist: [lips against mic] In the water"

"What's brown and sticky? A twig."

"so i'd tell ya a casey anthony joke but my mother would kill me..."

"Why didn't Barbie and Ken's relationship work out? Because Ken always came in another box."