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Joke of the Day

"A bear walks into a bar and says to the bartender, ""I'll have a pint of beer and a.......... packet of peanuts."" The bartender asks, ""Why the big pause?"""

"I was going to tell you this joke about Matthew Shepard... ...but I'm kind of on the fence about it."

"What's the most bitter tea in existence? Reality *cries in the corner*"

"What do you call a crate of ducks ? A box of quackers !"

"Why are brides so happy on their wedding days? No more blowjobs."

"""A Brita pitcher is only as good as the man who re-fills it after emptying."" -- Dalai Lama"

"Why doesn't Monica Lewinsky like going to the doctor? He always shoves a Bill down her throat!"

"Why don't mathematicians have degrees? They prefer radians."

"What's the difference between a club and a strip club? A club has a beat that you can dance to, a strip club has a dance that you can beat to."

"A man goes to a zoo but the only animal there is a dog. It's a Shitzu."