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Joke of the Day

"friend: here he comes. dont set him off again. me: ok me&friend: hey JADEN SMITH: What If We Are the Hay, And The World Is Harvesting Us?"

"I found out R. Kelly had sex with that girl because she reminded him of his mother He has an Oedipiss complex."

"4 gay guys walk into a bar, but there's only 1 available stool. What do they do? Flip it over."

"I was struggling to figure out how lightning works Then it struck me"

"How do you know a chinese thief has broken into your house? All of your rice is gone, your computer is fixed, and the mother fucker is still trying to back out of the driveway."

"What do homeless people get for Christmas? Hypothermia."

"What is a hipster's favorite candy? Rolos."

"What if a man existed w/one hand that's a steak and the other is lobster plus unlimited salad bar? This is the plot of ""Edward Sizzlerhands"""

"You think we should see other people? I'm bipolar. I am other people."

"Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until you hear them speak."