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Joke of the Day

"Two crows are in jail. What are they in for? Attempted Murder"

"Out of all of Santa's reindeer, the one that sounds most like a street name for crystal meth is all of them."

"So Halloween is fast approaching... Where I can get one of those cool Guy Fieri masks that all the anarchists are wearing?"

"I like to play chess in the park with bald men... ...Although sometimes it's hard to find 32 of them."

"Who lives in a pineapple under the sea? Madeleine McCann"

"That which does not kill me... should run."

"""Its not you. Its me."" ~ twins going through a photo album"

"Sex toy or Dog toy? What do you think?! http://www.cinderellastyle.com/can-you-tell-if-its-a-sex-toy-or-a-dog-toy-game-show/"

"I had a friend buy a European car and he kept telling me about it breaking down. I had to tell him that I didn't want to hear anymore of his Saab stories."

"Did you see the clown that hides from morons?"