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Joke of the Day

"I once met a girl with 12 nipples... Sounds funny. Dozen tit."

"The rest of the Justice League always makes Aquaman eat at Long John Silvers so they can watch him cry."

"How do you feel when there is no coffee? Depresso"

"What's the difference between me and a calendar? the 14th of february the calendar will have a date."

"Irish Car Bomb Yanks have a cocktail called an ""Irish car bomb"", but if you stuck two flakes in an ice cream cone and called it a 9/11 they'd get offended."

"According to all these ""note to self"" sticky notes I am a very forgetful person also I have no idea what these notes mean"

"I caught two teens smoking pot behind my office. Ten minutes later, my boss caught two teens and myself smoking pot behind my office."

"There's Angie, and then there's Drunk Angie, and one of us tried to make it to Mexico on an exercise bike."

"Why do Newfies want Quebec to separate? So it's a shorter drive to Toronto!"

"The fact that axe handles are made of wood is the ultimate ""fuck you"" to trees."