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Joke of the Day
"When you'd rather read a book than date a girl ... it's prose over hoes."
Next Joke
"Who should have played Bilbo? Who should have played Bilbo Baggins in Lord of the Rings? Bruce Willis. Because old hobbits die hard."
"Difference between a gay guy and a microwave? A microwave won't brown your meat."
"Vine is shutting down I might actually make more in a year than a vine star does in a week."
"Daughter: Daddy, why is the moon following us around? Me: I probably owe it money like everyone else on the planet"
"Circles are so pointless."
"jared from Subway What's jared's favorite sub? A junior with meatballs!"
"[coffee shop] *casually puts arm around wife* *reaches up to Free Wifi sign with a pen* *changes last ""i"" to an ""e"", draws downward arrow*"
"Why did the negative number look so surprised? He was nonplussed."
"When Peter Rabbit was working as a porn star, whom did his contract require to be on the set? Fluffer Bunny."