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Joke of the Day

"Walmart is giving away dead batteries for the holidays... Free of charge"

"My girlfriend says I'm hopeless at fixing appliances. Well she's in for a shock."

"I don't have a drafts folder. My tweeting style is ""blender without the lid on""."

"did you hear about the freak birth at chernobil? a baby was born with more eyes than teeth"

"Crocodiles; these prehistoric beasts can grow up to 20 feet! Although most just grow 4."

"Why do blonde girls have bruises on their belly buttons? Because blonde guys are stupid too!"

"Yay! The Democrats won the World Series!"

"Another off color limerick A sperm, alack and forsooth Was at it's moment of sexual truth It had hoped to fall On the womb's spongy wall But was dashed to it's death on a tooth!"

"Gravity Maxim Trow yourself from the building and catch from the boardwalk!"

"how to get a fat chick in bed... It's a piece of cake!"