88646

Joke of the Day

"I thought that whale movie was super offensive.... ...because of all those actors in Blackfish."

"What do you call a capital lambda? A sheep-da"

"WIFE: You promised not to spend the lottery winnings on something stupid ME: *climbing off my new elephant* He has a name, Karen"

"I got a bone to pick it's been stuck in my teeth for days"

"How do you keep a jack ass in suspense? Sorry, someone just knocked on my door. I will have to submit the answer tomorrow."

"Third grade Why did the blonde have the biggest boobs in the third grade? She was 23."

"Let's settle this like men... men with bad judgment & unlimited water balloons"

"13YO: Why's he happy? He got dog-piled. Me: He made a lot of groundage before getting put down. Husband: Yardage. Tackled. PLEASE LEAVE."

"Damn boy! What's your zodiac sign? Bc I think we should make that Sagittariuu into SagittariUS Oh you're a Leo? Le OH ..where are you going?"

"What's black and white and red all over? A penguin that's been knifed"