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Joke of the Day
"I didn't wear earrings for a long time and the holes closed, now I'm worried about my vagina."
Next Joke
"Relationship status: Just kissed my cat and he got up and moved to the other end of the couch."
"Coworker: GOOD MORNING! Me: Don't talk to me until I've had my coffee Coworker: But you don't drink coffee Me: Exactly"
"Yo mama so skinny she hula hoops with a cheerio"
"You're not in a serious relationship until he leaves you in a room alone with his phone."
"You know what's funny? My life :("
"[15 minutes into choosing which crab from the tank to have for dinner] Date: are you crying?"
"Somebody actually complimented me on my driving today. They left a note on my windscreen which said, 'Parking Fine.' That was nice..."
"Ironman is my favorite story about how sleep deprivation can make you a sarcastic, neurotic superhero without being a parent."
"Joke of the Month What do you say when people tell you June is already over?"