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Joke of the Day

"Geek humor: Thanks for the upgrade... You turned my floppy disk into a solid state."

"A man tells his doctor, ""Doc, help me. I'm addicted to Twitter! The doctor replies, ""Sorry, I don't follow you..."

"What's the difference between a rooster and a prostitute the rooster says cockadoodledoo a prostitute says anycockwilldo"

"My doctor just told me I'm suffering from paranoia. Well he didn't actually say that, but I could tell it was what he was thinking."

"Too many girls want attention, not enough want respect!"

"I had to grease a lot of palms to get to where I am today *cut to me oiling up tropical trees* haha excellent"

"1st Cannibal: I don't know what to make of my boyfriend these days. 2nd Cannibal: How about a hotpot ?"

"Guy discovers Terrorist Hideout.. Reporter: So how did you catch 'em? Guy: Umm.. I just found this Charizard then..."

"I was talking to my buddy about 50 Shades Of Grey He said ""yeah, my wife and I have been doing S&M for years."" ""Really!"", I said, ""I had no idea!"" ""Sure,"" he said, ""she sleeps and I masturbate!"""

"Why did Constantinople fall? Itstumbled."