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Joke of the Day

"I can sum up my taste in music and my political and religious beliefs in just a few bumper stickers."

"A blind girl was giving me a handjob last night..... and said ""this is the biggest cock I've ever felt in my hand."" I said ""Nah you're just pulling my leg."""

"sorry I called your baby an ""it"""

"I watched this documentary the other day but I didn't like it... ...because it was absolutely incredible."

"One of my favourite things is Pork Souvlaki on a Pita But it's hard to get the animal rights activists to stay still"

"Did you hear about the farmer who tried to be a stand up comedian? His jokes weren't dairy funny."

"M: What do you want for dinner? H: I don't care, you decide M: Sushi? H: No, but whatever. M: Mexican? H: Nah, but your call. He's dead now"

"The search for the mystery penis chopper goes on Detective jones has had a tip off, but will be back at work on Monday."

"I told a psychiatric ward patient to stand in the middle of two black poles ... and he did it ! The absolute madman!"

"See You Next Tuesday What's furry on the outside.. Wet on the inside.. Starts with a C... Ends with a T... And has U & N in-between? A coconut!"