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Joke of the Day

"Did you hear about the woman who had to quit her job as an air traffic controller to date a monk? She got out of the flying plans and into the friar."

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"Why is light beer like having sex in a canoe? They're both fucking close to water."
"The inventor of distorted mirrors has passed away. His funeral will be held in asymmetry."
"Potassium and Oxygen went on a date. It was OK."
"Mr Circle went to go see a doctor after being stabbed... The doctor said his blood loss was very sphere"
"Why did the guitarist go to prison? Because he fingered A Minor."
"Wouldn't it be cool if Zombies & Vampires become human if we bite them first? Somebody needs to test that one."
"Here's my impression of an astronomer discovering that an asteroid is coming to destroy earth: ""This will make me famous but not for long"""
"Lazy person fact #4523974903 You were too lazy to read that number."
"Why did the scout leader get arrested? They caught him eating a brownie"