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Joke of the Day

"Let your girlfriend know how much you love her by screeching loudly like a pterodactyl whenever she talks."

"Know why Chick-fil-A doesn't have a sandwich with two patties on it? because they don't want two chicks on top of each other! *RIMSHOT*"

"What's long, green, and smells like bacon? Kermit's middle finger."

"Why was the radioactive food going to taste bad? The meal would fallout of flavor."

"Hear about the time Mohammed's wife called him a pedophile? Mohammed responded ""Pedophile is a pretty big word for a 9 year old!"""

"How do you fit 4 gays on a bar stool? Flip it upside down"

"Where do you find a dog with no legs? Right where you left it!"

"Damn gurrrl, is that chocolate on your face? *licks face* Damn gurrrl, that is not chocolate on your face."

"I moved to the south, people are different here. I started a conversation with a midget, but had to walk away. He was a little racist."

"They say you are what you eat So I bought myself some ""ready to eat Apricots"" And after I bought them I was indeed, ready to eat Apricots."