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Joke of the Day

"What's the difference between pink and purple? The grip."

"Q: Did you know they are taking out all the K-Marts in Afghanistan? A: They are putting in TARGETS!!!"

"How do u spell candy w only 2 letters c and y"

"I gotta stop the filthy double entendre jokes But it's so, so hard"

"Chuck Norris easily won the Iditarod dog sled race by pulling a sled load of 16 dogs, 800 pounds of supplies and with a dead sperm whale chained behind it."

"What is a cheating wife's worst nightmare? A husband in his hybrid"

"Birds are dinosaurs? No. I want dinosaurs here or I want them completely gone. I don't need a bullshit imitation dinosaur to shit on my car."

"In the new version of Star Wars, Harrison Ford slowly flies the Millenium Falcon in the left lane with the turn signal on"

"Why did the physicist at the Hadron Collider get thrown in jail? Because he was a mass murderer"

"I've started 2016 with a goal of losing 20 pounds... Seems like I've lost more, my ATM is empty"