86329

Joke of the Day

"Damn girl are you sitting on a F5 key? Cos' that ass is refreshing"

"if there were a zombie apocalypse i'd save a lot of kids but it would be only because i'd need them later to feed zombies so i can run away"

"When a man speaks in the forest and there is no wife to hear... is he still wrong?"

"If chopsticks were really better than a fork... ...wouldn't we be digging ditches with pool cues?"

"What do baby swans dance to ? Cygnet-ure-tunes !"

"How are martinis like breasts? They are better shaken, not stirred. I usually have one in my hand. One is too few and three are two many."

"What does Delia Smith say when she wants to fight a road? 'Let's be avenue.'"

"Jared Fogle likes his women how he likes his subs 6 and 12 (I know it's an old one)"

"My dog's got no ""O""s. - How does it spell? - ""dg""."

"79 million people are without access to drinkable water Though on the bright side, the number is decreasing!"