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Joke of the Day

"France and Italy simultaneously declare war on each other France surrenders Italy changes sides Both lose"

"If you think you have a stupid question, just remember NASA engineers once asked Sally Ride if 100 tampons were enough for a 7 day mission."

"""just get thru the 1st day without them finding out youre an elephant"" IT dude: ""ok here's your new mouse"" [just fkn destroys the place]"

"What do you call a short, round-bellied Salarian? Mordin Volus"

"Every funeral is open-casket if you've got a crowbar and a sense of adventure."

"Terrorists are so slutty They'll blow on the first date"

"Two peanuts walked into a bar. One was assaulted."

"A women asked her husband, ""What do bees eat?"" The husband replied ""Honey, how should I know?"""

"What happens to your car insurance if you don't notify them that you've wrecked a car? I don't know, but it's not wreck-amended."

"Chuck Norris farted once. He did this in the Sahara Rain Forest."